Harder than I thought ...

For anyone that thinks your ex can't stress you out and exhaust you emotionally, think again. I have been dealing with my ex for too long these past few days, and I am so beat. Even the shortest conversation can run me ragged, and I really dislike that. 

Dealing with the guy has always been a sensitive issue. Especially after we separated. It took him a really long time to get over the fact that we will never be a couple again, so I was starting to hope that I would be completely free of him in the beginning of this year. He has a lady friend (I call her that cause she's super old), and he seems content with his life. And, on more than one occasion, he's told me that he hopes the best for me and SM. Well, that's good.

Only, he doesn't really mean it. Every chance he gets, he turns a simple conversation into a dog fight, threatening to use lawyers to take B away from me, and promise that I will never see her again because I am a horrible mother that can't do anything right.  

Wtf, is that, right??

Well, I can't quite put my finger on it, but I believe he suffers from bi-polar disease, just like his whacko nutjob of a mother does. Yeah, they're never gonna read this, so I'm just gonna be blunt. 

Doesn't help that he is drunk almost 100% of the time ... when he isn't at work. So, it makes it extra hard to talk to him reasonably about anything of importance. And, the last few days, it's been about getting him OFF my cell phone family plan for good. 

I'm just so exhausted with the fighting, the name calling and having to endure his threats and inconsistent personality. I really screwed myself by getting too involved with this one. So, I like to think I've learned my lesson. Over the past years with him, and every guy after that I may have dated for longer than a few weeks. 

I've learned that I do not want anyone like M. I can spot one like him a hundred miles away, and steer clear! I don't even want a guy like that as a friend. Hell no. 

So,  I think it's safe to say that I want to completely be done with M. I don't even want to be friends. Not even with anyone associated with him. Now, I know this can't completely  happen since we still share B, but what I wouldn't give for him to just say to hell with it, you raise the kid. I've actually been contemplating ways to make him disappear out of our lives for good. No killing! I mean, like faking a dna test or something like that. But, I think that would come back and bite me in the ass when he and his parents go after me for all those years of child care that they've helped us with. Plus, emotional damage. Yeah. I don't need to deal with all that. 

I guess I'm stuck with them. All three of them. At least til B is old enough to make her own choices and move out of mommy's house. Sigh. Til then ... Loser ex and his crazy nutjob of parental units will be lurking. Hooray.